My beef with David’s Bridal.
April 25th, 2005*This is a long rant where I reveal the dress that I hope that other girl in the wedding likes and my deep detesting festering hatred for David’s Bridal.
I swear that David’s Bridal and US Air get their employees from the same pool of unhelpful, uncourteous ass hats. I was dreading going to DB. So much so that getting drunk was really on my list of things to do before trying on dresses. I was so antagonistic about it that I wore deoterant so that I could mess up their samples. (Yeah - call me a rebel! Look out!)
In order to make the shopping a little less painful, we made an appointment. They assigned us a woman, let’s call her Christine, because that was her name, who was pretty busy. She came over to us 20 minutes AFTER we arrived for our appointment to ask what we were looking for. She asked my size and I said that I wasn’t sure. I had about 3 dresses in my hand so she took me over to a dressing room and said that I could start while she went and looked for other things for me to try on. But she didn’t measure me or check to see what my size was. So either she is pretty good at looking at someone and figuring it out, or she didn’t care. Which do you think is true?
So another 20 minutes passes and when Christine is no where to be found, Porter decides that she should round up some more things for me to try on. And we find somethings that are really awesome. Like this skirt and shirt for example:
And I really like it. And I try on a bunch of other pieces as well, but we keep coming back to this one. Now, I am a pretty big girl. No matter how much I wish I wasn’t or how many times a week I go to the gym… I am who I am. So anyway. The top that I tried on was a size 14. There is no way that this thing fits me. And I don’t really know how I look in things with spaghetti straps or no straps. So Porter and my sister fish around for more things for me to try on so that I can at least get a feel for what style looks good on me. But I don’t have a strapless bra on so we have to find an employee to go and get me a bra to try these tops on with (another 10 minutes added to me being in a dressing room) but it was worth it I guess because we finally decide that I can wear something strapless or with spaghetti straps. (Two notes, there are no mirrors in the dressing rooms so in order to see how hideous or nice you look in something you have to come out and parade around the store, which INCLUDES MEN OUTSIDE THE DRESSING ROOM, secondly, the bra I put on, retails for $90. NINETY DOLLARS. Who are they kidding?)
Then what happens? Oh my?! Christine reappears. And says that she will measure me for the specific top that I want to get. And then?!?! She’s gone again. For another 20 minutes. So Porter asks another person on the floor if they can measure me. And I shit you not, she looked at me, turned to ANOTHER sales person on the floor (both of them have been doing nothing up until this point) and says that I need measured and then the second girl looks at me and scowls, the first one chuckles and they walk AWAY WITHOUT GETTING ME ANY FREAKING HELP!
Now up until those bitches scowled at me, my time at David’s Bridal, while not the best time of my life, was at least tolerable. I had found something to wear at Porter’s wedding. I had managed to convince myself that I just had to order the dress from them and pick it up immediately and NEVER go back there again. And then those two tiny stick girls who probably throw up their food every chance they get, scowl and giggle at me. Like, “You think I am going to measure the fat girl? No way!” And I swear to you, it took ALL of my effort to put on my clothes, tell my sister and Porter that if we don’t leave this VERY INSTANT I am going to freak out, and manage to control myself out the door. Once outside I yelled a little bit, but there are plenty of David’s Bridals and I don’t have to order my dress from that particular one. And I plan on writing a nasty, lengthy letter to the corporate people.
After three tries and THREE TERRIBLE experiences with David’s Bridal, I have decided that I would rather wear a sack in a wedding than deal with them. It is a shame that they have the biggest selection and the widest variety of sizes to try on. BASTARDS.
