My low-tech pointer, saving one life at a time.

I have this low-tech pointer that I use during my presentations. It looks a lot like a radio antenna. And when I give presentations, INEVITABLY someone always says, “Would you rather use my laser pointer?” And I always flatly refuse. “I don’t like laser pointers because it makes it completely apparent if I am shaking.”

Well today – Today my story has been changed for all eternity!

(Hed – you should give me your address. You NEED one of these. Read on.)

My scooter is broken so this morning I opened up the engine compartment so that I could take out the spark plug. When I reached into the compartment, I ran into a sticky web. Which scared me. Because no sooner did I touch the web did a BLACK FREAKING WIDOW come out from hiding. I repeat: A BLACK WIDOW! I was going to get it out with a screw driver because there was no way I could kill it in the small engine compartment. And then I thought that the screwdriver wasn’t nearly long enough for me to get the spider out without her getting up to my hand. That is when… you guessed it… I pulled out my telescopic presentation pointer, extend that thing to max length, and move that black widow right out of its home. The spider was about the size of a nickel. She must have been living in there for a long time.

The funny part is, I got her out of the scooter and accidentally flung her into the grass, so I lost her. Now there is a big black widow on the loose in front of our apartment.

But the best part is that now when someone asks me with judgement in their voice why I am using a low-tech pointer, I have a way better story as to why I prefer it to a laser pointer. Because damn – the worst damage I can do with a laser pointer is burn out her retinas and don’t spiders have like a hundred or something?