And the beat goes on.
September 21st, 2006I guess in a matter to keep on with the crying at least once every day, someone had to come in and tell me in front of my class that it didn’t look like I was doing my job.
What is to follow is a string of profanities so if you are my mother, or easily offended, don’t expand this entry:
I can not believe the lack of fucking support I get from people who are supposed to be my fucking co-workers. I have gone above and beyond what I feel is necessary here and the assholes have NO respect for me. Everyone keeps telling me that things might be different and to not give up applying for the job just because I am getting treated like shit now. But how in god’s name am I supposed to keep my head above water and have faith in these fuckers if this is what they show me now. I am severely convinced that I am completely wasting my time applying for this job. Apparently one of the new people thinks I am incompetent. The other just avoids talking to me. The two older people are just HARD to deal with because they are mostly control freaks. And they hate the other control freak. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!! I FUCKING HATE MY JOB!
But of course, I have to find something good. Or I will not make it through this year. So I hope that this is the last time I have to talk about it here and maybe come October 1st I will find myself a good therapist. One that prescribe drugs. Because I got no personal sunshine to ward out this darkness.
It’s not worth risking your personal well being for this job. Becoming a tenured professor takes a LOOOONG time so you tell them to take their tenure and go F@$! themselves. You have worked too hard and deserve more respect than they are giving you. I know… if only it were that simple.
By PSU roomie, on 09/22/06 at 12:02 amIs this your first year teaching? As a teacher myself, I can honestly tell you that the first year is ALWAYS the hardest and it often sucks. My first year I was screamed at by enraged parents, completely lost control of my high school class once, and was even reduced to tears on more than one occassion. Teaching is not easy. Also, fellow teachers aren’t always supportive - you’re their competition in some cases, and that is the nature of the beast, unfortunately.
All that said, it DOES get better. If you like I can email you some extremely helpful articles on classroom management and teaching in general. They helped me out a lot. In the meantime, HUGS! We love you!
By Ari (aka Kestrel), on 09/22/06 at 6:16 amI love you. Hang in there! Things will get better. I can’t wait to see you so I can give you a great big hug. Call if you need to talk.
By Sheshsa, on 09/22/06 at 4:31 pm