Third Grade
November 19th, 2008I had only two friends in 3rd grade. One of them lived very close to my elementary school. I would go over there to play probably about once or twice a week. Her mom showed me where they kept their snacks and I ate them. Sometimes in secret.
About a month later, I wasn’t invited over anymore. And my other “friend” told me that I was invited anymore because I ate too much. And she said I was fat.
Since I don’t remember very much about friends before this point in my life, I have to assume this was the first bad experience I had.
The last half of third grade I really didn’t have any friends. This experience has since taught me three things:
1. That friends talk shit about you behind your back and that is just life. Whether they do or not, I will always belief that they do.
2. Whether I am fat or not, that word will always stay with me.
3. I eat too much.
Thank you Jennifer and Betsy for being the beginning the disfunctionality that permeates 95% of my relationships. And for the perpetuation of self-consciousness regarding my size.
Jennifer and Betsy hopefully went off somewhere to screw themselves. They were stupid and small minded to be a friend to you and I’m sorry you had such an awful experience. Fuck the Jennifer and Betsy’s of the world and the society that created them.
By sierra gitana, on 11/19/08 at 7:08 pmI will tell you that you are very beautiful (inside and out) and one of the most positive, upbeat and crafty people that I know (and smart you doctor, you), and you have much to offer the world. I love you and will never have one negative word to say about you and I know all of the loved ones you surround yourself with feel the same.
If it makes you feel any better my bff Kelly did the same to me in 8th grade. It was pure hell, one of the worst years in my life. I wanted to die. She used to steal from our friends and tell them I did it, so they wouldn’t be my friend any more. She would write me mean notes, one said ‘how many unsuccessful diets have you been on’, among other horrible things I don’t care to recall, because even then I had a complex about my weight, and now, so what?! And so it went that when we went off to high school I was able to begin again, make new friends and made new experiences for myself. Her karma came when she didn’t, and decided to move to another district (ha-ha), and when she tried to apologize in high school, even as recent as 2 years ago I opted to just say thanks, but no thanks (Bitch).
Ironically a lot of those friends that fled from me then have asked me to be their FB friends, to which I have to wonder why. Until now I’ve kept them there, with out a word, and thanks to you I just may go and delete them, after all, where were they when I needed them? I don’t care to associated with the likes of the now…
Anyhoo. Hold it in your heart that you are beautiful. You have the sense to make good choices about who your friends are.
I love you….and I like to eat too, so next time you’re home we’ll go enjoy a fabulous evening of fine dining together with some good friends and laugh about the assholes that shaped us into the beautiful people that we are now.
yeah. what she said.
By Lisa, on 11/21/08 at 9:43 am